Tonight I went to "Gold in Tex" for some fries and a coke... And unlike Texas, they have squater toilets. Yes, you squat over the porcelain basin sunken into the floor. When I went to flush and pick up my purse and camera. . . SWOOSH! Something fell into the toilet and was swooshed away by the flushing current! My heart stopped as I grabbed for my breast pocket. This couldn't be- My cell phone had been flushed! And when the water settled- NOTHING! Gone! I flushed my bloody cell phone down the toilet!  

So, you are wondering - did I go in after it? Well, I tried. And now you will all be in on how I soon become the first human to contract "Hand and Mouth" disease. I walked out of there in a daze. My friend Baden lost his cell phone after having it 24 hours, during a blurry night out. This tops the hell out of his story. Yep, always got to be one up on everyone else, don't I?

 But then later, something good happened. I was sitting at an outdoor cafe with 4 South African friends, when some Taiwanese men came up and started talking wildly to us. Then I realized that they were accompanied by TV cameras and a mob of people. They told us that they are famous Chinese singers. Oh, yeah. . . thought I recognized you. . . so, then they joked with us and we made them get up on a table and sing. So, this Sunday, 7pm, yours truly will be on ChinaTV. Now I just have to figure out which station, out of my 107, is ChinaTV… 

And I wonder why I have problems teaching "conditionals" to the kids. You have to determine if something is likely or unlikely to happen and change the verb accordingly. How would you catagorize "If I flushed my cell phone down the toilet…" Likely, or unlikely? 

That's at least until I figure out why I am not supposed to flush toilet paper if the toilets can handle cell phones.